Outside of a similar experience, it is impossible to know what it's like to lose a baby. In the past, well-intentioned friends, family, and medical staff often tried to ease parents' grief with assurances ... "things will get better" ... "move on" ... "get pregnant again."

Times have changed dramatically, thanks to Jane Wilkins and others who organized a bereavement program at University of Iowa Children's Hospital. "I knew something had to be done regarding bereavement care and educating medical staff about the significance of perinatal loss," she says.

Wilkins helped assemble a multidisciplinary team of nurses, physicians, chaplains, and morticians to develop an organized bereavement strategy. The end result was the Touching Hearts Program, now in its 20th year of helping people who experience a miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth, or newborn loss.

Touching Hearts gives grieving parents and family members time alone to bond with their babies. Parents leave the hospital with digital photographs, locks of hair, plaster casts of tiny hands and feet, and handmade quilts, afghans, outfits, hats, and booties.

"We provide bereavement information of all types, from funeral arrangements and support groups to children's grief."

Surveys show the vast majority of parents would return for future care. "I think this speaks volumes about the quality of our program," she says.