Fathering an infant

For many men, nothing in their lives equals the thrill of watching their babies being born. Becoming a father is a big event. Being a father is something you can do every day. Showing your baby love and affection through holding, cuddling, playing, and diaper changing helps the baby feel secure and important to you.

Babies learn about the world through their senses. The sense of touch is probably the most developed sense that babies have. Holding your baby gently but firmly helps them feel secure. You may worry that the baby is fragile or that you will drop them. Do not let your fears keep you from enjoying your baby. Close contact with your baby lets them know and trust you.

Taking care of a new baby is a learning experience for both mother and father. Because new mothers get so much attention, fathers may feel left out. Remember a father is as important to a baby's development as a mother is.

Here are some things you can do as a new father:

• If the baby is breast-fed, bring the baby to his/her mother at feeding time whenever possible. Change the baby's diaper either before or after the feeding session. Bring the baby's mother a cool drink or help in another way. She needs and will appreciate your support.
• If the baby is bottle-fed, arrange to do one or more feedings a day. Holding the baby, talking to him, and making eye contact increases the attachment you feel for your child.
• Recognize that there will be changes in your household and your life. Take over some chores at home so the baby's mother can devote more of her time to caring for the baby.
• Arrange a few days to give your new family time together. You may want to do this right after mom and baby get home from the hospital. Make sure there are enough supplies in the house to last for a few days: food, diapers, and baby needs. Let family and friends know you are resting and will welcome their visits in a few days.

It's normal to feel challenged by your new responsibilities as a father. If you feel frustrated, angry, or otherwise unable to take care of yourself or your baby's mother, talking with a trusted relative, an experienced father, a counselor, minister, or your healthcare provider can help. If you feel frustrated enough to shake or hit your baby or the baby's mother, stop and take a quiet break away from them to calm yourself.

Last Reviewed 2005

Disclaimer: This content is reviewed periodically and is subject to change as new health information becomes available. The information provided is intended to be informative and educational and is not a replacement for professional medical evaluation, advice, diagnosis or treatment by a healthcare professional.

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